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Canned Meat by Think Geek

Do you want to know what a Dragon or an Unicorn taste?

Then you will want one of these two cans, the Canned Dragon Meat or the Canned Unicorn Meat.

The special meat Dragon specifications are…
  • One can of delicious, slightly charred dragon meat
  • From the Sisters of Radiant Farms, Scotland branchl
  • One can contains 100% of your daily value of havoc, terror, inferno, destruction, magic, and rage
  • Also contains trace amounts of poetry and ballet
  • Note: Dragon meat is precooked for instant victory feasts
  • Dimensions: 4″ diameter
The special meat Unicorn specifications are…
  • 14 ounces of delicious unicorn meat, canned for your convenience
  • Imported from a small independent cannery in County Meath, Ireland
  • Crunchy horn bits in every bite – an excellent source of Calcium
  • Tastes like rotisserie chicken but with a hint of marshmallow sweetness
  • Easily spreadable for sandwiches, hors d’oeuvres, and more
  • Sparkly meat lends the unmistakable air of class and sophistication to your parties
  • Unlike other meats, unicorn fat is polyunsaturated and lowers your LDL cholesterol
  • Not yet approved by the USDA or FDA, but the nuns have eaten it for centuries and they’re healthy as horses
Enjoy your food! 🙂

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